Is Perception Reality? How We Create Our World
We don’t see things as they are. We see them as we are – Anais Nin
Perception feels real, but it isn’t reality. The world you see is unique to you because the lens you view it through is filtered through your past, your fears and your beliefs. Reality doesn’t change — your perception does. And the moment you question that filter, you open the door to a different world.
We Create the World We Live In
When I first learned about assessments, I spent weeks re-examining what I believed were my truths. I was horrified at how small I had made my world because of my assessments (perceptions). That was the moment I realised: my perceptions were my chosen version of reality, filtered through my lens. They were not the truth.
This is where the common question arises: is perception reality? The honest answer is no. Reality exists outside of us. But our perception is the filter that shapes how we see it, and in turn, how we live the life we term, ‘our reality’.
What Creates My Reality?
Every experience, belief, fear and hope becomes part of the lens through which we filter life. What looks obvious to you will look completely different to me. The trap is that we believe that our perceptions are correct and quickly dismiss other alternatives.
That’s why perception feels so convincing, almost set in stone. It directs our choices, reinforces our beliefs and even determines how we communicate. Our past writes the script. Our perception delivers the lines.
Perception vs Reality
Think back:
- Have you labelled people or situations as right or wrong, good or bad—only to be proven wrong at a later stage?
- How often have you undervalued yourself based on your perception of an experience (e.g. a break-up) without objective evidence to support it?
When we live as if our perceptions are the truth, without evidence to prove them, our world gets smaller. Why? Because living inside judgement leads to emotional, mental and spiritual stagnation. Eventually, it decays our ability to grow.
So many of the people I coach live with crushing anxiety and depression. Not because reality itself is unbearable, but because of the self-perceptions they’ve mistaken for truth. Almost every one of these beliefs can be traced back to pockets of past trauma — single moments that were painful, but never the whole story.
Over time, those fragments built up into a collection of painful experiences that distorted their sense of value and self-worth. Slowly, these skewed perceptions hijacked their confidence and merged with their identity — becoming who they believed they were. Lies dressed up as truth.
So how do you know when it’s your perception versus reality?
The next time you find yourself questioning your worth, stop and ask:
“Where is my overwhelming evidence to prove this is the truth?”
Evidence is not a memory or a conversation, it’s factual information which could be presented to a court of law and proved, beyond a shadow of a doubt, true. That is your measuring stick! If you cannot find evidence—if it cannot be verified as fact—then it’s not truth. It’s an interpretation.
The Other Side of Perception
Our emotional wellbeing is our responsibility. To claim it, we must interrogate our long-held “truths” about ourselves and those we hold of others. On the other side of perception—just beyond your judgements—lies the life of freedom you seek.
Because while perception is not reality, it is the way we create the world we live in. And if we can question the filter, we can change the story.
Reflective Questions for Readers
- What long-held perception about yourself might actually be an interpretation rather than the truth?
- How has your perception of someone else changed once you learned the full story?
- If perception creates the world you live in, what filter would you choose to look through today?
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